It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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