dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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