It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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