Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize