maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
