Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
