I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
