Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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