oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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