I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
