I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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