I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
