Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry therealtruth hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(602): View more from Arizona

So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.

(480): View more from Arizona

so you punched his junk, right?

Fav 16 1143 4418
share tweet
(508): View more from Massachusetts

billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.

Fav 11 1439 3886
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(630): View more from Illinois

Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"

Fav 17 5280 1296
share tweet
(734): View more from Michigan

debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.

Fav 22 1302 4303
share tweet
(516): View more from New York

i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD

Fav 5 2315 1140
share tweet
(415): View more from California

get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing

Fav 4 1387 996
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!

Fav 4 1496 1049
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(971): View more from Oregon

Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me

Fav 0 772 472
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(253): View more from Washington

I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.

Fav 0 83 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT