I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Hippo gnu deer
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
