I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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