So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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