question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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