Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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