Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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