I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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