Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
