I wanna bring you to show and tell
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
