The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize