thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
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