I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
