Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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