you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize