so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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