I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize