1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
