i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
