She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
