If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
