The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Holy sore nipples Batman
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
