I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
