there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Do you have feelings for this penis?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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