clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize