Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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