What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
