Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Randomize