I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
