it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
