Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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