Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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