There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
