doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
