I just pynch a tree in the face
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He had one of those small greek statue penises
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
