Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
