this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
