i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
