I just cut my nipple shaving
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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